Thursday 4 September 2008

Perfume again

Just received in the morning post a REVIEW COPY, I'll say that again because I'm so delighted with it, A REVIEW COPY, which means FREE, FREE, FREE, AND I DIDN'T PAY FOR IT, of a book I have been wanting to get my hands on since I saw it reviewed in the paper last weekend: "Perfumes - the guide" by the patron saint of scents and potions Luca Turin. I just realised that I'm so excited that that was all one sentence, so here is another full stop for you. Breathe deeply, my lovelies.
The book itself is a collection of reviews of over 1500 perfumes, from the sublime to the ridiculous, and while it's handy for a little pat on the back (Mitsouko, one of my lifelong favourites, gets five stars and "the best fragrance ever"), it is also completely unputdownable for the all-round brilliance of the bad reviews. A perfume I won't name (people have been sued for less) gets this : "A chemical white floral so disastrously vile words nearly desert me. If this were a shampoo offered with your first shower after sleeping rough for two months in Nouakchott, you'd opt to keep the lice." Another, more concise: "Teensy-weensy cutesy-pie floral of the worst vintage" and, finally, pithy and to the point: "Death by jasmine".
It also poses the big questions that keep us all awake at night, such as "What is chypre without oakmoss?" and "Since the restriction of benzyl salicylates, have floral perfumes been the same?". I honestly don't know how I've lived without this book for so long. I apologise to all non-scentophiles for the single note of this post and will post on a more general note next time. I leave you with the masterful review for Coty Miss Sixty : "Ideal if you intend to be a Miss at sixty".







Herewith Mitsouko. A treasure.

7 comments:

Steve said...

At first I thought it was a guide to Patrick Suskind's novel...!

Lucy Fishwife said...

Ah but what more is there to say about the genius of Patrick Suskind? While the eternal question of whether the indole is played out as an olfactory cliche... well, that one will run and run...

The Poet Laura-eate said...

Will you ever speak to me again if I confess to Gap's 'Pink'?

I also once tried Chanel No. 5 (somewhat bland) as a result of reading MM's autobiography, but aside from these, perfume never passes my consciousness.

Does this make me normal or abnormal?

Lucy Fishwife said...

I may not be the best arbiter of what is normal... Gap "Pink" is fine! I myself am still in half-mourning (grey and violet, half-veil) for the discontinuation of Gap "Grass", despite the fact that it smelled more like green bananas than cut grass.. I loved it and have a bottle I keep in a drawer so it won't go off as fast. I too love Chanel No.5 - the classics are classics because they don't date. Worthy of MM.

Lucy Fishwife said...

My God proof that I'm brain dead today - I do love Chanel No 5 but AGREE WITH YOU (see I was listening) it can have a bit of blandness - it is a classic though! And as such not a bad one to wear on spec. Sorry - trying to organise Mr Fishwife's 40th AND the transportation of my rapidly-demising dad's effects from Canada to here and unable to keep a coherent thought in my head for longer than 5 seconds. Which is no excuse for not reading attentively. I do apologise.

mantua maker said...

I bought a perfume nearly 10 years ago, Folie Douce by Gres. It always put me in a good mood when I wore it and people did comment on how nice I smelt! It seems quite hard to get hold of now, although I guess I could buy it on the internet. I've still got the bottle with the last tiny drop in it. What I would like is a website that groups perfumes together so I could get something similar. It's annoying to buy a perfume then realise that you don't really like it after all.

Lucy Fishwife said...

Hi hon - well it's worth asking Helg at PerfumeShrine (link on my sidebar under "Things I Do When I Should Be Working")- it's not in THE BIBLE so I presume it's been discontinued, but I've just googled it and kelkoo.co.uk have it!!! Don't say I never do anything for you.