I'm currently having what we charitably refer to as "kaleidoscope brain" chez Fishwife - mostly down to a weekend of slow but steady alcohol intake, and the fact that due to snow, cancellations and lunches I ended up working 2 and a half days last week (result!!!). I therefore have no coherent idea for a single and on-topic post and can only offer you a small selection of things that have stuck in what passes for my mind over the last few days.
1) I had lunch on Saturday with my parents; they were passing through West London to see a newly-adapted indie-thrash musical version of Wedekind's 1906 play Spring Awakening at the Lyric. My stepfather, musing, over a pub lunch: "Well, it'll be interesting to see how they fit the competitive masturbation scene to music..."
2) Overheard by my cousin in (of course) Islington: "Mummy! I've got pesto on my gilet!"
3) Hurrah for the return of the rat! Many of you may argue it has never been away and in fact is more with us than ever. I say every culture gets the vermin it deserves, and given the extraordinary stupidity of most popular culture (etc) these days, thank God at least we value brains and adaptability in our animal infestations. I know I've said this before (and will say it again, and no doubt again) but rats are highly intelligent and resourceful, they are loving and protective parents, and wash food before they eat it (where possible). Also they build separate latrine areas in their nests so food and sleeping areas are never contaminated. How unlike most celebrities.
This, you see, is the problem with the weekday lunch. Any more than a glass of wine in the middle of the day and I suddenly lose all ability to follow a train of thought, at least any one that doesn't go STARTER - WINE - MAIN COURSE - WINE - COFFEE - BRANDY - BRANDY - BRANDY - FAGS - INEVITABLE FLU FROM SMOKING OUTSIDE IN THE SNOW. Just had lunch with my friend Nicky Nicky Veronica Veronica, who is the nearest thing to me it's possible to get apart from being a few years older and a Virgo, and after half a glass of wine I had forgotten I had to go back to work. Luckily I remembered, and if my boss is reading this I'd like to say that I'm actually blogging in my tea break.
Best stop now...
Oh but PS - if there's another blog out there that manages to mention pesto and Wedekind in the same post, I'm very surprised...
24 comments:
Well, now you've gone and thrown down the gauntlett (knocking pesto onto my copy of the collected work of Frank Wedekind). Btw, is Frühlingserwachen as good as Writing Therapy?)
Your labels worry me, Lucy. I mean, are you planning a series of posts on 'competetive masturbation'? Pesto and Wedekind are a challenge alright. May I leave you to ponder 'declivity' and 'snood'?
(Or even 'competitive')
I say hurrah for lots of booze because your post gave me a laugh. I do like the multi-item variety of blog post best - I must have the attention span of the average ITV3 viewer.
I agree rats are much maligned but I can say that from the comfort zone of never having seen one.
Dotterel - Tim Atkinson's Writing therapy? I think Wedekind was more Freud and Tim Atkinson is more Jung, but I may be wrong. Or still slightly lunch-drunk (like punch-drunk but more fun)...
BT - God I hadn't even thought of the episodic nature of post tags. No, hopefully this will be the only one, and only because my stepdad is one of the few people I know who can mention it with reference to 19th century German theatre. Now if you don't mind, allowing my attention to wander while crocheting has resulted in a declivity in my snood, so I must go back and redo it...
FF - Thank god, i wasn't up to a full essay. Hurrah for the fragmented espresso-brain! My only real experience of rats is "Mrs Frisby And The Rats Of Nimh", and recently "Ratatouille". I know they can't talk but I'm prepared to believe they can wire up burglar alarms and make spaghetti.
You skipped desert? Sacrilege!
One has to think long and hard about whether to have dessert or brandy. It is, mostly, a no-brainer for me...
Dessert does it for me every time. Forget the booze, bring on the sugar.
"it'll be interesting to see how they fit the competitive masturbation scene to music"... Hmm. Is this the origin of thrash metal?
What about an alcoholic dessert? Some friends of mine moved from Brixton to Barnes. They realised just how much they'd gone up in the world when they overheard a mother saying "Barnaby, play NICELY with Sapphire!"
I am very interested to know how they fitted the competitive masturbation scene to music, did he tell you?
Some fine observations there, but go easy on the booze and coffin nails gal - you don't want to lose those girlish good looks a moment sooner than you have to and boththese vices are notorious for their detrimental effects.
I'm saving all my vices for when I'm old, 'cept chocolate (and the odd bout of passion).
Steve and Eryl - according to my mum they did the competitive masturbation bit without music (one can only begin to imagine what would make a good soundtrack???) and my stepdad's students said it was, and I quote, "well graphic". I should point out that my mum is a librarian and my stepdad a lecturer and as such not the people I would have imagined having this conversation with....
Cassandra - Alcoholic puddings are a terrible waste of alcohol! Bit like "9 1/2 Weeks" where I just squirmed uncomfortably all the way through going "What a mess!!! Think of the state of the duvet!!! How do you get syrup out of your navel???""
Laura - Hi doll - I KNOW but I'm relying on my pact with Lucifer to keep me youthful. Failing that, Clarins Hydraquench and Berocca...
FF - Sorry! I missed you out! My only virtue in a gruesome mass of vices is that I can leave the sweet stuff without a backward glance. Can't resist cheese though.
I rather enjoyed the snippet blog. It was like having lunch with someone after a few drinks - well, not after, I mean at the same time as.
You know what though - I have a real phobia about saying the word "masturbation". I am not a prude at all and most words trip off my tongue easily but if I am forced to say that one I go bright pink. Must be my Catholic upbringing.
It is good to be back to wine. And it is surprisingly good out here. I had a very nice Shiraz the other day - a clean skin so quite cheap for the quality.
RB - Are clean skins like wine boxes? Still have fond memories of being a student in france and buying 2litre plastic containers of "vin de table" for 2 quid each. I think the French export all the real crap so even the no-brand supermarket stuff is drinkable.
"I ended up working 2 and a half days last week (result!!!)." I like your style. I've managed to snag a gig doing one overnight shift a week: which might sound dire, but at least it does mean I only have to spend 3 days a week being "customer-facing" as the cant phrase is.
Hi Dave - I do actually quite enjoy my job but nothing beats eating cheese toasties in front of afternoon TV! Always quite fancied nightwork though, as getting up in the morning is possibly the worst thing about capitalism. Are you also in the Mighty World of Bookselling?
Great post - morsels of entertainment in differing flavours. Hope the synapses are up and functioning again now ?
Girlchild once had a rat as a pet, charming creature, and I feel safe announcing to the world (as I know she will never read this) that it was infinitely cleaner and more intelligent than she was then. (Fortunately the new incarnation, post 18 and nearly a person, would make it more of a competition). Apologies if this sounds jaded but she's knicked my car - again !
I'm just breezing in to say that I adore Elizabeth Jane Howard's books. I think 'Marking Time' was the best of the Cazalet Chronicles. Wonderful books!
Please, no more booze or coffee posts. Since the doctor diagnosed an ulcer, I'm off both. Reading about them makes me want to cry.
Clean skins are bin ends really. Good wines but where there isn't enough to bottle and label a case - so they are in plain bottles. But they are excellent and very cheap. We have a fab local wine shop. You'd love it. There's always things to taste and the guys are really helpful and friendly.
TR - my nextdoor neighbour (and mate) has an 18-year-old son and she has now lost count of the number of times she's had to drive somewhere at 3am to collect him, sometimes from police stations etc... she got him a cat and he's barely out now (sissy)!
Aparatchick - I'm reading my way through the series for the millionth time. How good are they?? As you read them you're thinking "I'm Clary, really... no, Louise... no, Sybil..." Poor you with your ulcer! You have all my sympathy. Is it the kind that can be cleared up with antibiotics?
RB - I think that's what the Nicolas stores do as well - they sell those "local" regional wines at about £3.99 in totally no-frills plain bottles with Identikit labels and they're very nice. How's the weather down there? Have you got a tan yet?
Just tripped over your blog en route elsewhere: it's terrific and I so enjoyed reading it. And immediately recognised the Lloyd quote. Most excellent. X
Welcome! Cakes in a minute if that tea (turning to door, raising voice crossly) EVER GETS MADE!
Oh the lovely Lloyd - even when he was a tubby bugger he still smouldered like a good 'un. On my way to yours for a visit...
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