Thursday, 16 October 2008

Just a quick one.



I was serving a customer yesterday. As she was paying she was chatting cosily to her beloved on her mobile (I presume that's who she was talking to, as she had suddenly adopted a startlingly twee ickle-girly voice and kept calling him "Baby" - presumably not her bank manager then, although in this financially unstable day and age who knows? Whatever gets you that overdraft). Her attention was caught by a pile of Mr Men bookmarks on the till - she picked up the one saying "Mr Perfect" and said "What's this?" "It's a bookmark." I replied. She put it back. "Oh no, he doesn't read." she said, and left. To which all one can say is: Well, he isn't Mr Perfect then, is he?????

Or am I being overly subjective?

20 comments:

Rol said...

No, that seems like a perfectly sensible piece of character judgement on your part.

Lucy Fishwife said...

Thank you! It is, isn't it? I mean I'd be being unreasonable if I stipulated what colour hair Mr Perfect had to have etc... but "he doesn't read"?? What kind of sub-anthropoid meathead is she dating?

mantua maker said...

Eeerrrm...I might be guilty of speaking to Prof. M.M. in a girly voice and calling him "baby" - I'm usually being ironic (I don't know if he realises that though). Thankfully, he does read. The people that we bought this house off only had one book (H.Potter) and were very surprised when we were viewing that we came with a tape measure to check out bookshelf space before putting in an offer.

Lucy Fishwife said...

Mr Fishwife ditto. I think it's because I'm so patently NOT a baby-talk kinda gal. We have a running gag about Bitsy, the bubbly blonde Marilyn-voiced airhead he's seeing on the side (I bet SHE wears "Habanita"...). One day I will find out it's true and run off with the handsome tormented spaceship captain I'm not seeing either.

mantua maker said...

Prof. M.M. says: "Aren't you lucky that I have Lucy's essential qualification for being
perfect."

Lucy Fishwife said...

PROF MM HAS A FIREFLY-CLASS SPACESHIP?

Steve said...

He doesn't read Mr Men books or he doesn't even read Mr Ben books? Either way he doesn't sound much of a catch. Or maybe he really is a baby and is therefore below the required reading age? I'm trying to be charitable.

Lucy Fishwife said...

I'm failing to be charitable. I think he's one of those meatheads who reads one book a year, on holiday, with a helicopter and raised gold lettering on the front (Mr Men books far too textually complex). And likes it when his girlfriend talks to him in an ickle voice and calls him "Baby". But then I've only had one coffee so far today.

The Poet Laura-eate said...

Quite!

Reluctant Blogger said...

Urgh I would throw up if anyone called me "baby' and I would certainly never address anyone else that way. Yuck! I think anyone who calls someone "baby" is well-suited to a partner who does not read.

Mr Perfect of course gets criticised for being too perfect doesn't he, so perhaps not reading would be a way round that.

titian-red said...

Playing devils advocate here...is it better to read ghastly gold titled schlock on a regular basis, or "good" books but rarely ? My partner hardly reads at all,( I am a rapacious reader) and only books I pass to him going "You HAVE to..." (Currently he is on "Water for Elephants" and "The Road Home".) Then I mull further and decide it could be seen as a useful measure of commitment.... "he doesn't read, and yet I still love him" ?

Lucy Fishwife said...

Laura - *high five*

RB- I remember reading an interview with Dolly Parton where she said her husband called her "Babycakes" and she called him "Daddy". And thinking that possibly Dolly Parton was the only living human being who could get away with that and not sound creepy or backward...

TR- I know, I'm being mean. I like a shot of Stephen King or Jennifer Crusie as light relief. And some of the brightest and most interesting people I know barely manage to fit in a book a month. I was just deciding to find her un-charming because she was twittering down her mobile while paying me. And bright orange...

titian-red said...

Oh God, orange - well she deserves to be cast into outer darkness - there was obviously not a redeeming feature between them...
and it is probably a good thing that the long suffering doesn't read, we have a 3 storey house and books are already racking up on each stair as all alcoves are already full of shelves and there are so many boxes under the beds there isn't even room for dust

Lucy Fishwife said...

Oh my god, you live in my house.

titian-red said...

Probably, but it's so untidy I haven't found you yet! Vrai Blond was one of the samples I got in my last order - I LOVE IT (sorry vulgar capitalistion) it makes me want to throw myself across a grand piano and huskily growl out a luscious torch song (squinting thro a swirl of cigarette smoke) before leading some poor sap upstairs and relieving him of his money, self respect and sanity.....

Lucy Fishwife said...

I KNOW! Not entirely suitable for daytime wear but I needed a boost on a grey dreary Monday. Makes me wish I was sipping a huge Martini in a dimly-lit bar while Dominic West and Nathan Fillion argue over who gets to chat me up first.

titian-red said...

Phew - no cat fight then, because Ive got Edward Norton and Christian Bale........yeah right

Lucy Fishwife said...

Hmm interesting. So you go for the still-waters-run-tetchy type. Both fine fine actors with a tendency to let their tempers do the talking...

titian-red said...

Hadn't actually made that connection - but yes, you are right, for me though, it is the intensity they manage to put across (oh and the high browed/high cheekboned look, along with the fact that even I wouldn't get a crick in the neck while gazing deeply into their eyes !)

Steerforth said...

Ghastly woman. I used to refuse to serve customers who talked on their mobiles.

I even looked into buying a signal jammer - it would be so satisfying to be able to sabotage someone's phone call - but sadly they're too expensive.